Beautiful one, did you know you have the power to change the world? You matter. You are important. You are loved. Never give up on your dreams because one day your dreams may come true in a way you never imagined.
Don’t let anyone tell you what you can’t do. Don’t let anyone try to make you hide your talents to make someone else look better. Your capabilities are endless. You deserve happiness. You deserve to be treated equally. You deserve to be loved. You deserve to be respected. You are valued. You are treasured. You are special. Never be ashamed of who you are. You are beautiful just the way you are.
Girls need to be encouraged at a young age. They need to know they have the capability to be anything or anyone they choose to be. The way girls are taught and influenced at a young age plays a part in their beliefs as they mature. Teaching girls that they do not have to limit themselves because of the beliefs of society gives them confidence and empowerment they need to one day make a difference in the world.
Never stop believing. Never stop dreaming. Never stop encouraging. Never stop shining.
When we learn our true self worth, we begin to expect better. We stop accepting anything less than the best. Learning to value ourselves brings a fresh mindset.
The good thing about developing a new mindset is our energy begins to change. Anytime we lack self-worth, we attract the wrong people and the wrong energy. If we don’t care about our worth, how can we expect anyone else to care?
The way we present ourselves teaches others how to treat us. It teaches them what to expect from us. Presenting ourselves in a positive light will show others we expect positive energy. When you’re a positive person, negative energy makes you uncomfortable.
If you’re attracting negative energy, it’s time to evaluate yourself. Evaluate your surroundings. If negative energy doesn’t make you uncomfortable, you may be a source of the negative energy. Once you begin to value yourself, and the energy that surrounds you, things will begin to change.
Know your worth and don’t expect or accept anything less than the best.
Today is World Mental Health Day. Mental health is a topic that definitely needs more attention. Oftentimes mental health is not a priority due to the stigma that is associated with mental illness. The negative judgement, discrimination, stereotypes, and negative comments often cause those that are suffering silently to avoid seeking help.
Mental health stigma can cause many effects. As previously stated, those suffering silently may avoid seeking help. Those that are receiving treatment may discontinue treatment due to stigma and lack of support. When loved ones, coworkers, friends, and others display negative behavior, this can make coping with mental illness all the more difficult. Bullying, embarrassment, and harassment can cause, and aggravate, mental health symptoms. Mental illness and stigma can also affect self esteem. When any or all of the mentioned factors come into play, those living with mental disorders may begin to develop negative self thoughts.
It is important to recognize signs and symptoms of mental illness. Common signs and symptoms of mental illness include: feeling down, depressed, or hopeless, frequent mood changes, becoming easily agitated, frequent confusion, memory loss, difficulty concentrating, frequent unexplained tiredness, difficulty sleeping, delusions, hallucinations, frequently feeling anxious, paranoia, difficulty coping with daily situations, stressors, and people, changes in appetite or eating habits, multiple symptoms that cannot be linked to a medical cause, beginning or increasing drug or alcohol use, increased anger, hostility, violence, suicidal thoughts, and homicidal thoughts.
It’s okay to not be okay; just never give up. If you are concerned about changes in your mental health, or if you’re concerned about someone’s mental health, it’s okay to voice your concerns. Be aware of the signs and symptoms of worsening mental illness. Routine primary care and mental health professional followups are important. Whether it be routine appointments, medication, counseling, support groups, or a combination, compliance is very important for the management of your mental health. Taking care of your physical health can help balance your mental health. Declining physical health can impact your mental health. When a change in either is noticed, it is very important to notify your healthcare provider or mental health professional. Try to work on improving your sleep hygiene, consume healthy meals, become and remain physically active, and engage in healthy conversations.
If you or a loved one shows signs of mental illness, it is important to have a support system in place. Help is available. Knowing you are loved and supported can be a major key in the deciding factor to seek help. If suicidal or homicidal thoughts occur, or if any mental health emergency occurs, there are many options available to get help. Go to the ER or call 911. Contact your primary care provider or mental health specialist. Reach out to someone you can trust. There is also a 24 hour National Suicide Prevention Lifeline available. The number is 1-800-273-8255.
When we live to please others, it’s often difficult to realize our own worth. Basing our worth on the input of others can have a negative impact on us. Have you ever given your all, and felt great about it, then ended up feeling horrible because you didn’t get the credit you thought you deserved? Don’t let this stop you from giving your all.
Remember that science project, presentation, or essay you did your best to complete? You thought your work deserved an A+ but the teacher gave you a B-. It may have hurt to receive a lower grade than you expected, but you gave it your all. The important part is you gave your all.
While at work, it’s easy to feel overlooked. You try to do everything by the book. You bring positive vibes. You leave your stress at the door and display that beautiful smile. You get the job done. You feel great about your performance. Even in the midst of all of your great work and feelings, one thing is missing: your supervisor doesn’t acknowledge all of your hard work, dedication, and positivity. Once again, the important part is you gave your all.
If we give up each time we don’t get the credit we believe we should receive, how far would we make it in life? Not everyone is going to appreciate the gifts you have within you, support you, or be a fan of you. You have to be your biggest fan. You have to believe in yourself. Never let someone else be the deciding factor in the path your life takes. If the input you receive is positive, use it as a tool to better yourself. If the input is negative, don’t let it get you down and discouraged. No matter what, always strive to better yourself.
This world we live in is full of people that were rejected by someone at some point in their life. Some of those same people didn’t let being overlooked or rejected stop them from becoming someone great. They didn’t let the naysayers deter their journey to greatness. Neither should you.
I frequently say “You never know who’s watching, you never know who you may inspire.” Over this past week, I started doubting myself. I began to wonder “Am I on the right path?” Just when I started to think about all of the times I wish I had more support, I began seeing posts about Tyler Perry’s grand opening of Tyler Perry Studios. Here is a man that faced many obstacles in his life, yet he never gave up. Imagine if he gave up on his dreams the first time someone didn’t believe in him. He has touched the lives of countless people over the years. This weekend, he inspired me. I refuse to give up just because someone else doesn’t see my potential for greatness. His story has encouraged me to push myself harder to get to my desired destination in life.
There will be times when others don’t believe in you. That’s perfectly fine. Believe in yourself. Know your self worth. Stop living to please others. When you feel like giving up, reevaluate yourself, reevaluate your plans, remember why you started, and keep going. Never let anyone dull your shine. Keep shining bright. Your light might brighten the life of someone else.
Sometimes the best thing you can do is just listen. There are times when every situation does not need a response. Don’t be so quick to respond to every situation.
Listen to your children. Vital information can be missed by tuning children out when they speak. It may seem like they’re “just talking” sometimes, but that one moment you decide to ignore them could be a moment that will forever be regretted. I’ve made it a daily routine to tell my children to have a good day before they go to school. When they return from school, I ask “how was your day” and I listen to every word. When they go to practice, I ask how practice went. I’m concerned about every aspect of their lives. I let them know I care. I let them know they are loved. Imagine if the one time a child may be depressed or angry, and the one time they’re ignored, is the time they carry out a plan that may have been preventable if we only listened.
There are so many times where situations may have been avoidable if just one person took the time to listen. It’s so easy to tell someone how they should deal with situations. It’s so easy to tell them how we would’ve dealt with a situation better than they did. How much easier would it be to just listen and try to obtain a true understanding of their thought process? Speaking over someone while they’re trying to pour their heart out, when they’re possibly at their wits end, is not the time to shut them down. Listen to them. Wait for the appropriate time to speak. Sometimes we find our own answer in the midst of venting.
Imagine how you would feel if you knew your words, your lack of patience, or your decision to not hear someone out was the trigger to someone’s actions. What if those actions could have been avoided if you let them know you cared? Sometimes all it takes is just listening. Show someone you care. You don’t always have to have the final word. Try to understand where others are coming from. Try to understand their thought process. Show compassion. Show someone you truly care enough to listen, and to be the support they need during tough times.
It’s a new month. The year is almost over. When is the last time you put yourself first? Do you take the time to make yourself a priority?
Sometimes we get so busy with daily responsibilities, we neglect ourselves. As a parent, it’s easy to devote countless hours to our children and their schedules. School and work can also take up a lot of our time.
It’s absolutely fine to make yourself available for others. It’s also fine to make time for yourself. Making yourself a priority isn’t selfish. It’s necessary.
Take time to relax. Give your mind and body a break from the day to day hustle and bustle. Taking a walk on the beach, taking a bubble bath, reading a book, and gardening are all inexpensive ways to relax. A good massage can also be relaxing. Whatever works best for you, try to devote time to find a way to relax on a consistent basis.
Getting a good laugh in can be very relaxing. Constant stress, no matter the source, can take a toll on you. Smiling can help with relaxing. Deep breathing exercises are great as well.
Don’t feel guilty about taking time for yourself. We all deserve time to relax. If it’s only once a month, it’s a start. Take time for yourself and enjoy it.
Posted at 2:16 am by Eula Weaver, on September 30, 2019
This will be one of the most difficult topics for me to discuss. It takes a great amount of courage to discuss this aspect of my life. As with every topic I discuss, I hope this one helps someone that may be able to relate.
There have been many times I felt like my prayers weren’t being received or heard. Sometimes life can become so painful we don’t know what else to say or do. I’m human. Sometimes I get discouraged. Sometimes I lose faith. Sometimes I wonder if I’m just meant to live in pain. “I’ve prayed. I’ve believed. What else am I supposed to do?”
Some of the most painful moments are surrounded by some form of loss. I lost my maternal grandfather and my father within four months of each other when I was only seven years old. At the age of 13, I watched my oldest brother take his last breath in Hospice. These three men left a void in my heart. I began to experience a hatred from my mother a child should never feel. The worst part about it was hearing “you know how she is.” Everyone made excuses for her actions.
I learned just because you’re a part of a family, it doesn’t mean they’ll have your back. My first harsh life lesson was being raped, at the age of 14, on April Fools Day, and having my mother and brother not believe me, having them curse me out and call me heartbreaking names. My brother even said “it’s people like you that get people killed.” I’ll never forget those words. When the truth was revealed, and I said “If you would’ve had the testing done, you would’ve seen I was telling the truth” my mother sarcastically said “Well I’m sorry if I hurt you.” My brother? He didn’t say much of anything. How could he say anything? He still associated with the guy that was responsible. Even after the truth was revealed, he continued to associate with him. This same brother had absolutely no problem taking my inheritance from me. My father left our home to me. My mother was still responsible for it since I was a minor. Somehow when she made him Power of Attorney as her health changed, they found a way to make sure my brother gets the house. I told this same hate filled mother “I forgive you. I don’t know why you were so hateful, but I forgive you.” These were the words I told her before she passed. I also watched her take her last breath. My brother became just another relative.
I’ve experienced homelessness. I’ve been divorced. After the divorce, I became a single mother that sacrificed beyond measure to make sure my children would not go without anything. It was at my darkest moments I realized just how much of a black sheep I was. I faced, and overcame, many painful life moments alone.
When it seems like you just can’t catch a break, hang in there. There may be something better in store. I remained on a job where I felt uncomfortable on a daily basis. I never realized the reason for the discomfort. I never realized it was partially self-inflicted pain. I remained on a job way longer than I should have. There was a great sense of relief, of peace, when I clocked out for the last time. The life experiences I’ve discussed are just a portion of the pain I’ve experienced. Somehow, I’m still here.
Not only am I writing with the hopes of inspiring and encouraging others, I’m writing to inspire and encourage myself. This is therapeutic for me. It’s helping me release so much hurt and stress I’ve kept deep inside for so many years. It’s helping me show others that may be in similar situations realize “you’re not alone.”
Don’t let the pain of life silence you. Your life story can help someone else.
Posted at 1:33 am by Eula Weaver, on September 30, 2019
One thing that I’ve noticed gets under the skin of negative people is refusing to conform to their ways. Negative people tend to get offended when you choose not to participate in their negativity. Never feel bad about being your own person. Never let anyone make you feel bad for choosing to be positive. Don’t feel like you have to contribute to the latest gossip because you don’t want to feel left out.
Negative vibes can bring an atmosphere down. Negative vibes can bring your energy down and those around you. It can make your day less productive. Sometimes, if we’re not careful, we can project those negative vibes onto others without realizing it. If you’re around someone that’s always negative, someone that always has negative energy, don’t let them bring you down. Don’t let negative energy affect your peace.
You don’t have to feel obligated to blend in. You don’t have to participate in conversations that go against your values. Upon awakening every day, something as simple as saying “I will have a positive day” can keep you motivated. Don’t waver. If you have to repeat this multiple times a day to remain positive, that’s perfectly fine.
As I was approaching my breaking point on my job, I found myself frequently saying “Today’s going to be a good day. I don’t have time for the drama. I’m not letting anyone disturb my peace. I will have peace.” I didn’t realize it then, because I thought I was just trying to help myself get through what seemed like endless days, but I was actually speaking my peace into existence.
Don’t be a chameleon. Don’t change based on who you’re around. If you’re a positive person, be positive at all times. Stay true to yourself. Speak positivity and peace into your life and your environment.
Take a moment to evaluate your life. Evaluate your surroundings. How is your energy and the energy of those around you? Do you have peace? Speak into your life and environment what you desire to have.
If you may be the person that’s not so positive, if you may not have the best energy, if you enjoy affecting the peace of others, take a moment to evaluate your life. Think about how it makes you feel when someone affects your peace. Be that change that’s needed. Be that positive example to those that may be used to the negativity.
You never know who’s watching. Your boldness could inspire someone else.
Posted at 4:17 pm by Eula Weaver, on September 28, 2019
I know it gets hard sometimes. Just hang in there. Even when the days seem dark, find a reason to smile. You never know, your smile could brighten the day of someone else.
“Misery loves company.” Oftentimes, the most miserable people are those that love to see others miserable. For some strange reason, there’s people in the world that find pleasure in seeing others hurt. There’s people that pretend to care about what you’re going through, only to discuss it with others. When you’re able to smile “in spite of” it often confuses people, especially those that expect to see you down.
My husband loves to say “Don’t wear what you’re going through on your face.” There was a time where I couldn’t understand why it was so important to smile even when I wasn’t happy. He was right. Walking around looking unhappy can invite false concerns. “You look stressed. Is everything okay?” These exact words are often said. Unfortunately, the words are not always genuine.
Smile in spite of. Even when you’re feeling a little down, show your beautiful smile. “There’s always someone that has it worse than you.” Even when I was having a rough day at work, I never let the patients see it. I walked into each room with a smile. It was amazing to see how many patients still smiled “in spite of.” They smiled in spite of their diagnosis, in spite of their financial status, and in spite of what they may have encountered before I walked into the room. If they can do it, so can we.
No matter what you’re going through, find a reason to smile.
Posted at 3:58 pm by Eula Weaver, on September 27, 2019
Fear can create many roadblocks in life. Fear of the unknown can cause you to remain in unhealthy situations. Remaining in unhealthy situations can eventually negatively affect you. Rather it’s a relationship, job, career, organization, or friendship, fear of the unknown can cause you to avoid exploring healthier situations.
The fear of being alone often causes us to remain in unhealthy relationships. It’s okay to be alone. Being alone isn’t necessarily a bad thing. You deserve to be treated like the Queen or King that you are. We often remain in relationships where we’re being mistreated or being made to feel invaluable all because the person on the other end says “I love you.” This concept can apply to family relationships as well. Even in the midst of feeling unwanted, I tried to hang on to the hope that “One day, it’ll get better.”
On September 9th, I finally made the decision to leave a very toxic work environment. It was the best decision I’ve ever made.
I began my career in the medical field as a Registered Nurse. I worked at a hospital for two years. I was the nurse that would get pulled to the side because I did more than the charge nurse thought I should be doing. If I was already in a patient’s room and they needed assistance to the restroom, or any other assistance, I would assist the patient instead of paging the Patient Care Assistant and having the patient wait until someone arrived. I never thought twice about helping patients, because I was there to help them.
My next job as a Registered Nurse was with a smaller organization. While working there as an RN, I began to notice things that were not becoming of a professional environment. As always, I remained there telling myself “One day it’ll get better.” I eventually applied to Nursing school to obtain my Masters degree to become a Nurse Practitioner. Once I was accepted, things really began to change. I told a coworker about my acceptance and she couldn’t wait to go behind my back to tell the CEO in an attempt to make it seem as though I would be leaving soon. Typical fashion of the environment I worked in, the news traveled back to me. Many more behind the scene setups continued as I continued working while attending school full time. As graduation approached, “the word” was I would remain there as a Nurse Practitioner. I was made aware this was being discussed in managers meetings before I was even asked if I was interested in remaining with the company once I graduated. Once I was asked, I agreed to stay. Why? Out of obligation. I felt obligated to remain with the company because I was able to work and attend school. I felt obligated to stay, even after a Nurse Practitioner with the company told me I shouldn’t feel obligated to stay. I felt obligated to stay, even after an instructor warned me about beginning my NP career with my current employer. All of the warnings and signs were there telling me to explore other options, but I felt obligated to stay. Never feel obligated to remain somewhere you don’t feel comfortable.
I worked for the organization for five years: three years as an RN and two years as an NP. Not one day did I feel comfortable there. The environment was filled with drama, gossiping, backstabbing, and people throwing rocks and hiding their hands. Providers didn’t look out for each other. They threw each other under the bus. The support staff were comfortable enough to be disrespectful. Many in management positions were a part of the unprofessionalism and enabled others. Why did I remain there if things were getting worse? I was afraid of letting anyone down. I was afraid of the unknown. What would happen if I walked away? I often came home and explained my work day to my husband in tears. I ended up being referred to a Cardiologist, Neurologist, and Pulmonologist. Every single diagnostic test came back normal. It was stress! On September 9th, I decided I just couldn’t take it anymore. Enough was enough. I finally decided to take control of my life and health. I finally decided to stop blaming myself for all that I experienced. I finally decided it’s time to stop saying “One day it’ll get better.” I realized “Today it’ll get better.”
If you’re like me, and you’ve allowed fear to hold you back, now’s the time to say enough is enough. It’s time to take back the control of your life and health. Don’t let fear control you anymore. It’s time to face your fears and shine like the true Queen or King that you are.